Sunday, July 03, 2005

Camp Howqua

I just came back from the Fungus and Young Adults camp at Mount Howqua, and i'm just overflowing with passion for God. I wanted to try to describe the atmosphere, fellowship and activities at the camp, but i've just realised that that is virtually impossible. I mean, what would the words: sensational, fantastic, terrific, splendid, awesome, marvellous, superb, unreal extraordinary, outstanding, phenomenal, primo, incredible and exceptional mean to you even if i used them?

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I'm exhausted right now, but i just have to get this out before going to bed and preparing for tomorrow's unfathomable 6 hour session with demented elderly residents at Arpad Hostel. I went to this camp not expecting much. I used to think that jumping during worship was totally unccessary, that it was too outwardly.

Well, on the first night there. This amazing speaker, Matt Fielder, prophecied over me. He said that i wasn't meant to be sitting on the sidelines, i was meant to be right smack in the middle of all the action. He said that God is going to do some shifting in my life so that i can serve him better. He also said that i was a "great man". This sounded partly true to me, but what motivated me most was Matt's passion for God.

He inspired me, he even brought me to tears when made me realise that God loves me for who i am, not what i've done or what i'll do; Jesus loves me even though i may sin against him. I know that. I know he loves me, but what was i doing for him? I realised that i was really self-conscious of myself when i was worshipping...but WHY?! Jesus went through public humiliation and death of the cross for me! Why shouldn't i worship him with all of my soul, heart, mind, spirit, body and strength?! I starting screaming my guts out, jumping my calves flat and raising my hands till they for sore. Why? Because Jesus loves me.

On the second night, the presence of the Holy Spirit was so tangible in the main hall. The place was full of Him, it was on fire! Matt had told everyone who wanted to surrender all that they had to Christ to respond to the altar call. Well, i looked at myself, and i didn't have much to offer, but i wanted to give to God all that i had, so i walked up to the front, raised my hands and prayed.

While i was praying, i felt a hand touch my forehead. It felt as though the hand was pushing my backwards, and my knees gave way. My eyes were shut and i didn't know who it was that was praying for me with his/her hand on my forehead. I lay on the ground, hands spread apart, eyes shut. All i could see was a white light, and i felt a warm, sensational was awesome, it was a wonderful was pure...pure peace. I was somewhat "nailed" to the ground, i couldn't, and i didn't want to get up. I knew it was the power of the Holy Spirit, i was with God, feeling the presence of God. Why would i wanna run away from it?

God has never been so real in my life. He is simply awesome, and He loves me so much. For anyone who still doubts that there IS a God who loves, hear this.

The food at the camp was poor. By the second day, tons of people felt sick, some because of the cold, but most of them were down because of a gastric bug; food poisoning. A dude called Yang was hospitalised and was put on a drip; he was in a dire situation. Another dude, Matthew, was also feeling really really sick. But Chris, the youth pastor, gathered everyone together for a powerful prayer that went on for about 15 to 20 minutes.

I couldn't believe it. The next morning, Yang walked in through the entrance TOTALLY healed! It was UNBELIEVEABLE! God answered our prayers! And that wasn't it, Matthew joined us a few minutes later feeling at a hundred percent! God is so real, and he answers prayer!

I felt and knew that God was going to make a radical change in my life. I've not really shared God's word "full-on" with any of my friends. But when i think about it, God loves me soooo much, and i can just marvel and rest in his loving arms, why shouldn't i share His great love with ALL my friends? Well, from today onwards, i'm gonna make sure that all my friends know that i'm a Christian, that they know that i'm always ready for them whenever they're ready to hear more about Christ.

During the testimonial/sharing time today, i felt the sense of urgency, as well as, responsibility to walk up there. I did. I usually wouldn't, but i guess this is God's why of "shifting some stuff in my life". I never liked public speaking, never would i have dreamed of making a testimony in front of a hundred people, but i did today. I walked up to the front, said what you just read in the above paragraphs...and guess what? Just when i said, "Jesus loves me..." something tripped in my heart, and tears filled my eyes in an instant. I don't believe i cried in front of so many gals...loL! But yea! i did! Why? Because He loves me...

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