Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Prac prac prac...

I just finished my most stressful prac exam by far. I wasn't confident at all walking into the exam room. But I walked out with a brimming with a smile of relief knowing the God had, without a doubt, pulled me out of this one.

My examiner, Kirsten (not her real name), was so lenient towards me! She was practically throwing marks at me. She kindly corrected my many mistakes and showered me with wave over wave of encouragement. When she showed me my score sheet at the end (she's not meant to do that), I was shocked when she gave me 9/9 for my exercise component! haha! My exercises were good, but my communication was jittery due to my lack of confidence. Nevertheless, she gave me awesome marks.

I never expected this.

Thank you, Kirsten.

Thank you, God! :)
I know that you'll never let me down if i put you first above ALL ELSE - exams, friends, wealth, health.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Is Grass Really Green?

"The grass is always greener on the other side...
If only our eyes weren't so firmly fixed on the other side
We'd notice that there's actually grass on our side
Yes, lush green grass..."

It's been raining incessantly over the past few weeks and the blades of grass on my lawn are starting to surpass me in terms of height. I peered out the window during breakfast one morning and was amazed at the rich green colour of grass...

Grass has always been green.. so have the leaves on the trees.

I've just never been able to appreciate it. Colour.

I thank God for putting colour into this world - to make it bright and vibrant. Can you imagine a world without colour?! How dull and gloomy would it be?!

The Yee's dropped by my place last night while waiting for Dani to finish worship prac nearby. It's been a long time since I last had a proper chat to Elysia. I remember her begging me to tickle the soles of her feet. It's peculiar. She's gets a relaxing sensation instead of a ticklish one. Anyway, I was shocked when she said that she was in Year 5! I never noticed that there was a massive 9 year gap between us! haha! I just assumed that she was older cuz she used to have a maturity that was way beyond her years.

"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." - Colossians 4:6 NIV

Today's devotion was apt. I've been praying for Godly wisdom on how to respond to awkwardly satirical/insulting comments. I've been receiving a lot of that recently, and I'm sure a lot of people get it too. I've had conversations like these recently:

"I hate it when people talk about their religion and try to convert others. I respect that they have their own beliefs, but they should keep them to themselves."

"Are you a religious person?"

"So are you saying that I'm going to hell if I don't believe in Jesus?"

"You're stupid for wanting to go back to Singapore for National Service."

"You should just quit doing Physiotherapy if you don't like it."

Some of these comments are very hurting, especially when they come from friends that I care for. Nevertheless, Paul reminds us to be "full of GRACE" and to let our words be "seasoned with SALT" (that is, to be with purpose and meaning).

Frankly, it's difficult to respond with Grace in every situation and it takes a mountain of wisdom to be able to season our words with purpose and meaning. That's where humility comes in. I pray that God would grant me humility to consider everyone as more important than I, and for Godly wisdom/salt to season my words with.

I want to make a commitment to be careful with my words.

I've got a Physiotherapy paper to sit for at 2.15pm this arvo. I'm only half prepared for it.. but I'm just gonna entrust it to God. There's no use worrying about it now. I'm not happy with the effort that I put into this subject this semester.. and naturally, I'd want to make a commitment to do better next sem. But I shan't do that... it takes the meaning out of a "commitment". What I will do is to pray for God to grant me a genuine interest in this subject.. and to find joy in learning new concepts.

It's a cold day today. Hopefully it'll make the uncool people feel a little cooler, and blow humble chill on those who're obsessed with being hot.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The Conclusion of the Matter

I've only made 8 posts in the last 6 months! That's just appallingly lazy. I stopped blogging because I thought there wasn't really much to blog about; and there were a lot more "interesting" and "meaningful" things to do than blogging. Nevertheless, I've been inspired by Jon to continue blogging. He seems to find a lot of encouragement from my previous blog posts; and I'm truly grateful that God can use the previous pages of my life story in such a fulfilling way.

I have a morbid feeling deep in my gut, almost a sense of fear, that the past few months in my life has been very uneventful, a complete waste of time. But I know that there ARE heaps of memories that I can thank God for everyday. I want to cherish these moments. I want to seal them away in a safe place where I can always find hope and encouragement through them in the future.

I came across a beautiful psalm yesterday:

"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely,
O Lord. You hem me in - behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me."

"Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
If I make my bed in the depths,
You are there.
If I rise on wings of the dawn,
If I settle on the far side of the sea,
Even there your hand will guide me,
Your right hand will hold me fast."

"For you created my inmost being;
You knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Your works are wonderful,
I know that full well."

"My frame was not hidden from you
When I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
You eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
Were written in your book
Before one of them came to be."

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting."

- Excerpts from Psalm 139

Wow! What a beautiful psalm! God knew our frame and the very nature of our souls before we were born. God has planned every day of our lives and has written them in his book!

This is reason to celebrate each day with everything that it entails - whether it be "eventful" or "boring". I will rejoice for this is the day that the Lord has made!

I was doing some last minute studying before, but I felt this sudden urge within me to stop and hop onto my email. There was an email of encouragement from Jon about being faithful with the talents that God has blessed us with. He's always sending these exhorting emails that never fail to inspire me. I'm grateful that God has entrusted Jon to me as a disciple, and I truly pray that God will continue to embolden his spirit and empower him with Godly strength.

I've gotta rush off to sit for my exam. But I was thinking about this today.. how I really detest studying. I believe it's a wrong attitude that has to be corrected. I pray that God will enable to me really enjoy and embrace learning about the interesting aspects of his creation.

God Bless! :)