Your Love

Your Love is like the morning sunshine
Your Love breaks the darkest rain cloud
Your Love puts a smile onto my face
Your Love takes me to a happy place.

Isaac
20.10.08

Finally 18..

After dunking Dan into the sea.

Twins! Dan?

Look at the sunset! Stop staring at my fats! :P

Beach volleyball!

Joce and Nic trying hard.

MHS Sauage Fest!

Fungus!

"My daddy + my Mummy + Sha Sha + Me" :D

After we threw Tommy into the sea.

Beer galore. Tom Wang had a Barcardi instead.

Watching the sunset.

Me and the 2 stooges.

It took me 4 hours to make that present for Sha -.-" Barcardi breezers for her to chill out during her VCE prep! haha!

18 orchids from 18 girls.

18 love letters from 18 girls.

My favourite sister.

To many more years of friendship + sausage fests!


-

Your Love is like the morning sunshine, Your Love breaks the darkest rain cloud. Your Love puts a smile onto my face, Your Love takes me to a happy place. - isaac 20.10.08

I just had a rather hilarious convo with my mum.

- Mum: *looks into the fridge* The salad's missing! Me: It could've run away. Mum: Oh, it's burried under the carrots. Me: I'm sorry, i thought they were dead. -

The salad was rotten.
-

Jerusha and I had our 18th b'day party at Mordialliac beach on Sat. The entire day was very much as enjoyable as i expected it to be! Fun times like these always pass, but the legacy they leave behind remain in the substance of a memory.
So, these are some of my memories:

1. The day was fantastic! 28 degrees. Sunny. And we rocked up 30mins late to our own party! -.x"
   
2. Trying to comfort Audrey with a seedy hotdog because a pack of dogs stole the $120 watch she + fungus bought me for my b'day. What can I say? Shucks! :D I told her that a poem would mean so much more to me than a $120 watch.
3. Getting decked by the 10-20 Fungahooligans who cracked eggs and poured a stew of fish oil and flour all over my back and into my undies -.-""""""" I should've baked my arse in the sun and got them to lick the egg off :) Yum. It's a pity that all had to leave early.. I would have had my sweet revenge if they had stayed on for longer :)
4. Receiving 18 love letters and 18 stunning orchids from 18 beautiful girls.
   
   
5. Picking up live jelly fish from the sea and chucking them at Fungahooligans.
   
6. Almost dunked Audrey into the sea.. but her pleas for mercy and Sarah's puppy eyes.. aww.. I regret not dunking her :)
   
7. Having a GREAT time with my old MHS friends: Tommy, Marcus, T. Wang, Phan, Jono, Victor, Jin, Antho, Banh, and Dan Lim. It was great seeing all of them together again after such a long time. We played volleyball, swam with the jellyfish, drank heaps, watched the sun set, dunked Tommy in the sea, dunked Dan Lim in the sea, and buried T.Wang. haha! Good times.. Jin brought sooo much beer along and almost got my drunk x.-""
   
   
8. The spectacular sunset. That was well worth staying for. Got to chat with Joce and Nic a lil at least. Glad that they could relax and appreciate a good Aussie sunset for once.
   

I just wanna thank everyone who bothered to rock up at such a remote place in the midst of all your important exams. It really means so much to me.. you've got no idea how much I enjoyed my b'day cuz all of you were there.

Special thanks goes to my parents for all the love they showed towards Sha and I through their actions. For 2 consecutive weeks they've slogged in the kitchen and sacrificed their weekends to cook and prepare delicious food for both parties. Thanks dad and mum. Dw, i'll get you guys your beach house + boat + car soon enough :)

All I asked for was a poem. But I got everything but a poem, which brings me to the other person I should really thank: my twin sister. Thanks Sha for writing me such a touching card + a POEM!! You might be oblivious to the fact that you're the only sister that I would ever ask for, but your words (mostly encouraging and sometimes harsh) have helped me become a better man. Thanks so much for always looking out for me :)

That's the card that Sha made for me.. the pic almost made me tear.

Thanks also to my best friend, Joce, who wrote me a 1300+ word prayer!! haha! And that email you sent me abt "The Ungrateful Friend" almost made me laugh my head off! Thanks for ALL your encouragements over the last, what, 8 years? Thanks for all the laughs, and for all the tough times :)

Faith.. Friends..

God is the cool fresh wind on a hot summer's day,
A friend is the towel that wipes the sweat off your brow.
God is the water in the desert,
A friend is the one who tips the water into your mouth when you're too weak to hold the bottle.

As most of you know, i was going through one of the toughest weeks in my life last week. Praise be to God! I've finally pulled through and my faith is stronger than ever.. and it will continue to grow. I've learned a few things..

Firstly, to be careful not to be too carried away to the extent that I'm replying on my own strength when I'm serving God. I thought that I was "close" to God, and that my faith was unshakable.. I'm a man of remarkable folly!

Secondly, spiritual attacks do occur. Jon (Lee) emailed me with a word of encouragement:

"The bible says that the devil doesn't care about those kind of Christians that keep quiet about their faith, or don't do much to lead others to the truth; which is Christ. He leaves them alone.But he DOES bother those who make a difference in the lives of others; those who share about their relationship with God. When u got the CIA room underway, it is startign to get others to build Christ centered relationships. So because of this, I am sure that the devil is trying his hardest to knock u off track."

Thirdly, Salvation comes only by Faith. And Faith is believing in something that isn't seen, that can't be proven! I have Hope and Purpose in my life. I've seen God change my life, and the lives of many of my friends. In that, I firmly place my trust at the foot of the cross. No turning back.

Finally, God has very graciously blessed me with friends who genuinely care. When I was in my lowest moments, God sent some angels to brighten up my day (i was surprised at the senders of some of those encouragements!)

Jon Lee, Dani, Betty, Erin, Franny, and Joce all emailed me to remind me of God's faithfulness and not to give up on him. From the deepest portions of my heart, I thank the Lord for the 6 of you. You've got no idea how encouraged I was with every word I read. I'm genuinely grateful that God has blessed me with you guys! :)

Spiritual Fatigue..

Free falling into the dark deep with nothing but a harness strapped around my waist... will the rope be long enough?

At this stage, it seems ever so short.

I'm tired. Physically, but more severely, Spiritually.

I never thought I'd come to this, especially with all that God's been putting on my heart over the past couple of weeks. Amidst my decision to make stand for God, I find my heart desperately crying out:

"Where are you, God?"

I need you.

This week has been overwhelming for me.

This Friday's the launch of MUSHroom. I want to, but I don't seem to have that same passion and fervor that I once had for it. And there are reasons behind it -

Firstly, I've been pushing and pushing; trying to motivate others to share my passion. I've been hit with harsh and discouraging remarks, but i did persevere. And here we are.. all ready to launch, but I found it soo hard to remain positive as I wrote a prep email for the CIA members last night.

Then, there's this doubt within me that some CIA members aren't really motivated to serve themselves! Sure, I could point out a handful that are serving because they love Christ. Yet I know that some others are there for the wrong reasons. And I think it's fair enough to say that the reasons are of a lustful/sexual nature. How can we influence people to develop Christ-centred relationships if we ourselves aren't practising that in our personal lives?!

I've committed two days this week to do evagelistic surveys at Melb Uni with Sam and Chris. In high-spirits, I boldly agreed to make a stand for Christ at Uni. Afterall, it IS the Great Commandmant to go and make disciples!

So off we went from 4-6pm on Tuesday. Sam did the first few intros. The first group we approached gave disgusted replies. One guy even added: "I hate you!" in a sincere tone of utter disgust. Sam thought that i'd be discouraged as it was the worse response he'd received in his 4 years of Street-E. I found it rather funny..

We approached 6 other pple. We received 6 other rejections. Ironically, I was gaining more and more confidence with each rejection. And I began to really comprehend what it felt like to boldly proclaim your beliefs and to obey Jesus. Chris joined us at 5pm, and the 3 of us approached this couple who agreed to do our survey.

Our 30-min conversation about the reality of God, the folly of the Gospel, the truth of the bible, etc. was extremely detailed. The couple were Vet Science students, and they obviously had a firm foundation about evolution (which they believe is a proven fact). The man told us that he had a Christian phase. He was persuaded by a Christian friend to honestly seek God. So he did. He said to God: "God, if you're real, show yourself to me."

He went on to read many Christian books. He said that God never "showed up", and it took very little to totally destroy what little faith he had. That story really discouraged me. At that point of time, I told Sam and Chris that I was actually intrigued and encouraged despite the disheartening conversation we had with that couple. I was encouraged because the man described faith as "folly; an insult to science" and that was precisely what Paul was talking about in Corinthians. He stated that God's wisdom seems like foolishness to man, and no one can understand it except by the Grace of God.

Unknowingly, lil sprouts of doubt started to well up in my heart and my faith seemed utterly shaky. Do I truly know what I believe in? Or am I just another idiot that has merely taken up a religion as a source of peace, hope and love? Has it all been real? Or have I merely been disillusioned?

The other thing that's really getting to me is my studies. I've been spending so much time thinking about God and doing ministry in Fungus and in Uni that I've TOTALLY neglected my studies. I'm seriously falling behind when my exams are just around the corner.

No, don't get me wrong. I haven't given up on God. I know that it is only by FAITH that we are saved. God HAS spoken to me through various parts of my life. He HAS put peace and hope in my heart in my lowest of moments. Jesus HAS changed my life - and many can testify to that!

But I'm spiritually drained.. i'm tired.. fatigued in every way possible. I've been reading the Word, but nothing's coming through to my weary spirit.

God, if you are real.

Show yourself to me.

Restore unto me the Joy of the Lord

And with Faith that pacifies the doubts of my mind

I need you, Jesus.

This I ask for your Name's sake.

Amen.

Birthdays

It was Aud's birthday not too long ago. Sadly, I couldn't make it to her b'day party, but I wrote her a poem. It's about the little things in life that we fail to appreciate because of the spirit of haste that overtakes us every moment of the day. Our birthdays would be pointless if we don't sit down and take some time to appreciate the little things in life; and ponder about what really has made us one year more mature.

The Silent Thief

The Summer Sun rises and hangs in stead,
The Winter moon lightens the ground of the dead.
Who shall ponder o'er history's past?
No; not one shall will to ask.

The fresh sensation against my face,
The rustling of the leaves on a nearby tree.
Clouds that sail over the sky of sea.
Wind blows North then East,
Of whose command shall it ever heed?

Blades of grass awake to dew each morn,
They give its due attention for none else will
A hurried shoe ends its life-filled life.
Rain falls outside leaving drops on the sill,
Yet none shall notice,
A silent thief empties attention's till.

Dark smoke rises this time each year,
The secret it carries disperses from sight.
Remembered are the cheers of the year behind,
Though forgotten, the jeers colour the future bright.
How much wisdom has the Victor gained?
How much youth shall he retain?

The Summer Sun rises and hangs in stead,
The Winter moon lightens the ground of the dead.
Who shall ponder o'er history's past?
No; not one shall will to ask.
- isaac

Speaking of birthdays, my 18th's coming up. My long awaited 18. It's really quite scary thinking back to the time i turned 13 and looking forward to the heightened responsibilites that being 18 really holds. Interesting..

I used to think flying on aeroplanes was cool because there are movies to watch and you get waited on hand and foot. But I would very much rather a good night's rest now..

I used to like sweet soft drinks. Now, i'd very much rather a hot Vienna and a chat with my close friends.

I used to knock off at 9pm sharp. Now, i only wish i could get the dishes done by 9pm.

I used to love God. Now, I know Jesus and I love Him more.

I used to watch my parents drive. Now, I watch them quiver and scream at me as i control the wheel.

Growing older doesn't necessary make you wiser.. I pray that God would grant me more Godly widom, a heart of love, and a spirit of humility for my 18th b'day.

I was pretty discouraged at the Fungus Leaders Meeting last week. I won't point any names out cuz that's immature, but i felt that I was looked down upon because of my age. Yes, I'm still 17 and very much the same age of a lot of the highschoolers at Fungus. What gives me the right to lead them or even to suggest to the older leaders how to lead?? What arrogance! I was dejected, but God reminded me of 2 Tim 4:12.

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity."

Words that restored joy and peace in my heart.

I guess some of you are reading my blog to find out what I want for my birthday. I thought about it, and nothing material particularly interested me because of their superficiality. So here's my wishlist:

• A poem (No one's ever written me one)
• That you would make an effort to know Christ; read his word every day for a week and pray for me and your other friends.

Bye Paul..

Paul left on Wednesday. I didn't think i'd feel this way. But I do miss him. I miss chatting with him about the most hypothetical stuff, watching "My Name is Earl", shopping, eating Mee Goreng and bowls of Coco Crunch in the middle of the night. He's got such a unique sense of humour. I took quite some time to get used to it. He reminds me of how lame i can be at times! x.-"

Sleeping on the floor for the past 3 weeks really got to my mood! Albeit, I had so many fun times with Paul.

At Philip Island; walking with the Penguins. We even got to see a wallaby jump outta nowhere into the path of the waddling penguins!

At Mornington Peninsula; fished for 5 hours and caught absolutely NOTHING! haha! That's something to remember!

At Healsville Sanctuary; we got to see the platypiii! loL! The massive pellicans. Paul even got the chance to stalk some kangaroos! Oh yes, and there was the wild wedged-tail eagle that scared the living daylights outta the vulture. The vulture flew away and the Birds of Prey show got cancelled.

At Box Hill; playing soccer.. watching you pull off all those fancy Singaporean tricks.

Paul, I'm glad that you took time off to come to Melbourne :)