Love

Love is so complex that all of creation is baffled by it. Man tries to put a finger on it, but it’s erratic and unfathomable nature engulfs it whole. Love’s too big to be subject to man’s comprehension, too small to be captured by a mortal’s grasp. If it were not so, Love would mean a bag of peanuts; a mere song sung for the sake of it’s own interest. Only it’s Creator shall wield it in the palm of his hands.

Love is powerful; it’s the substance that keeps the fabric of existence in place. It’s grasp so forceful that it held Christ on the cross. Yet it’s delicate and submissive like a master washing his servant’s feet.

I’ve been thinking recently and I’ve come to a conclusion that I really don’t have much love within me.

Love is asking: “How are you?” on a Monday morning.
The lack of love is asking: “How are you?” on a Wednesday afternoon.

Love is to prepare a nice hot cup of Chai Latte for a friend.
The lack of love is to prepare a nice hot cup of Chai Latte for a friend.

Love is praying for her no matter how heavy your eyelids may be at night.
The lack of love is praying for her no matter how tired you may be.

Love is looking at his faults and knowing that his heart’s purer than his actions.
The lack of love is looking at his faults and laying down judgment within.

Love is to be genuinely interested in his life.
The lack of love is to be interested in her life.

Love is the willingness to make a complete fool of yourself just to make her smile.
The lack of love is to make a complete fool of yourself to eventually get her fooled.

Just some thoughts on a train ride...

The Anthem

Worship was amazing last Friday night.
Hallelujah! You have won the victory.
Hallelujah! You have born it all for me.
Death could not hold you down
You are the risen King
Seated in majesty
You are the risen King

The anthem was sung with such passion and sincerity. It was the first time in a long time that I was encouraged and inspired by my fellow worshippers. My spirit was bursting with joy within me as I joined voices with my friends to proclaim the sovereignty of our risen Lord, Jesus Christ. I must confess that I wasn’t “spiritually right” with God last week, and I wasn’t in a position to lead worship on that Friday night. Praise be to God that my righteousness isn’t found in my own strength or merit, but in the death of my Saviour, Jesus Christ! So often the guilt of my sin weighs me down, and a spirit of unworthiness chains my mind. Fact is: I am unworthy; we all are. I am a sinful man covered by the blood of Christ. Now that’s reason to rejoice, that’s an overwhelming reason to be joyful!

Things that happened in the last month:

Crashed “Squeaky” into a pillar while reversing out of the Box Hill church office carpark. She had to undergo car surgery for 2 weeks. I’m delighted to have her back. Had to pay $950 for the repairs; that's a huge chunk of my $1000/season salary :(

I’ve been finding the work at the footy club rather repetitive and boring. It’s seriously quite draining and depressing having to sacrifice practically my entire Saturday. It’s taken a huge toll of my studies. I know that for sure.

FGA United’s first season in the Super 5’s league has finally ended. We came 3rd after losing the semi-final 2-1 to Hollywoods and defeating TTP the 3rd/4th playoff 6-3! I would’ve liked to come 1st, but I can’t deny that I’m happy with our achievements. The younger boys have really improved by heaps and bounds. Thanks for all the fun we had guys! It’s been a pleasure running circles around defences and getting run over by crazy bald headed aggros. I’ve seen determination and the willingness to head advice and learn. What more can I ask for?

Spent most of Sunday at the Melbourne Uni Open Day with Tim and Chris. We went around uni talking to random people informing them about our Christian group (Studentlife) and just chatting to them about what they thought about God. It took quite a great deal of courage to approach random pple and talk to them, but I think the 3 of us helped to build boldness in each other. I love the God-devoted servant hearts in these 2 blokes. They encourage me so much!

Went out with quite a few people last night to celebrate Josh’s 16th! I can’t believe he’s only 16 -.-“ I didn’t know what Sector 9 was about. When I got to Westfield, they told me that it was an alien movie -.-“” I started to grow a disgust against alien movies after watching Knowing and The War of the Worlds. I didn’t expect much from Sector 9, but it turned out to be a delightful mix of action, thriller, COMEDY, and Sci-fi. It was a very unique movie, so ridiculous at times that I couldn’t help but burst out in laughter. I rate it an 8/10. It’s got a amusement factor of 10 despite that rather mediocre storyline.

Box Hill. Time to get off the train!

Prac prac prac...

I just finished my most stressful prac exam by far. I wasn't confident at all walking into the exam room. But I walked out with a brimming with a smile of relief knowing the God had, without a doubt, pulled me out of this one.

My examiner, Kirsten (not her real name), was so lenient towards me! She was practically throwing marks at me. She kindly corrected my many mistakes and showered me with wave over wave of encouragement. When she showed me my score sheet at the end (she's not meant to do that), I was shocked when she gave me 9/9 for my exercise component! haha! My exercises were good, but my communication was jittery due to my lack of confidence. Nevertheless, she gave me awesome marks.

I never expected this.

Thank you, Kirsten.

Thank you, God! :)
I know that you'll never let me down if i put you first above ALL ELSE - exams, friends, wealth, health.

Is Grass Really Green?

"The grass is always greener on the other side...
If only our eyes weren't so firmly fixed on the other side
We'd notice that there's actually grass on our side
Really?
Yes, lush green grass..."

It's been raining incessantly over the past few weeks and the blades of grass on my lawn are starting to surpass me in terms of height. I peered out the window during breakfast one morning and was amazed at the rich green colour of grass...

Grass has always been green.. so have the leaves on the trees.

I've just never been able to appreciate it. Colour.

I thank God for putting colour into this world - to make it bright and vibrant. Can you imagine a world without colour?! How dull and gloomy would it be?!

The Yee's dropped by my place last night while waiting for Dani to finish worship prac nearby. It's been a long time since I last had a proper chat to Elysia. I remember her begging me to tickle the soles of her feet. It's peculiar. She's gets a relaxing sensation instead of a ticklish one. Anyway, I was shocked when she said that she was in Year 5! I never noticed that there was a massive 9 year gap between us! haha! I just assumed that she was older cuz she used to have a maturity that was way beyond her years.

"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." - Colossians 4:6 NIV

Today's devotion was apt. I've been praying for Godly wisdom on how to respond to awkwardly satirical/insulting comments. I've been receiving a lot of that recently, and I'm sure a lot of people get it too. I've had conversations like these recently:

"I hate it when people talk about their religion and try to convert others. I respect that they have their own beliefs, but they should keep them to themselves."

"Are you a religious person?"

"So are you saying that I'm going to hell if I don't believe in Jesus?"

"You're stupid for wanting to go back to Singapore for National Service."

"You should just quit doing Physiotherapy if you don't like it."

Some of these comments are very hurting, especially when they come from friends that I care for. Nevertheless, Paul reminds us to be "full of GRACE" and to let our words be "seasoned with SALT" (that is, to be with purpose and meaning).

Frankly, it's difficult to respond with Grace in every situation and it takes a mountain of wisdom to be able to season our words with purpose and meaning. That's where humility comes in. I pray that God would grant me humility to consider everyone as more important than I, and for Godly wisdom/salt to season my words with.

I want to make a commitment to be careful with my words.

I've got a Physiotherapy paper to sit for at 2.15pm this arvo. I'm only half prepared for it.. but I'm just gonna entrust it to God. There's no use worrying about it now. I'm not happy with the effort that I put into this subject this semester.. and naturally, I'd want to make a commitment to do better next sem. But I shan't do that... it takes the meaning out of a "commitment". What I will do is to pray for God to grant me a genuine interest in this subject.. and to find joy in learning new concepts.

It's a cold day today. Hopefully it'll make the uncool people feel a little cooler, and blow humble chill on those who're obsessed with being hot.

The Conclusion of the Matter

I've only made 8 posts in the last 6 months! That's just appallingly lazy. I stopped blogging because I thought there wasn't really much to blog about; and there were a lot more "interesting" and "meaningful" things to do than blogging. Nevertheless, I've been inspired by Jon to continue blogging. He seems to find a lot of encouragement from my previous blog posts; and I'm truly grateful that God can use the previous pages of my life story in such a fulfilling way.

I have a morbid feeling deep in my gut, almost a sense of fear, that the past few months in my life has been very uneventful, a complete waste of time. But I know that there ARE heaps of memories that I can thank God for everyday. I want to cherish these moments. I want to seal them away in a safe place where I can always find hope and encouragement through them in the future.

I came across a beautiful psalm yesterday:

"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely,
O Lord. You hem me in - behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me."

"Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
If I make my bed in the depths,
You are there.
If I rise on wings of the dawn,
If I settle on the far side of the sea,
Even there your hand will guide me,
Your right hand will hold me fast."

"For you created my inmost being;
You knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Your works are wonderful,
I know that full well."


"My frame was not hidden from you
When I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
You eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
Were written in your book
Before one of them came to be."

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting."

- Excerpts from Psalm 139

Wow! What a beautiful psalm! God knew our frame and the very nature of our souls before we were born. God has planned every day of our lives and has written them in his book!

This is reason to celebrate each day with everything that it entails - whether it be "eventful" or "boring". I will rejoice for this is the day that the Lord has made!

I was doing some last minute studying before, but I felt this sudden urge within me to stop and hop onto my email. There was an email of encouragement from Jon about being faithful with the talents that God has blessed us with. He's always sending these exhorting emails that never fail to inspire me. I'm grateful that God has entrusted Jon to me as a disciple, and I truly pray that God will continue to embolden his spirit and empower him with Godly strength.

I've gotta rush off to sit for my exam. But I was thinking about this today.. how I really detest studying. I believe it's a wrong attitude that has to be corrected. I pray that God will enable to me really enjoy and embrace learning about the interesting aspects of his creation.

God Bless! :)